I'm going to jail i love you
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I currently don't understand fingers.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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