dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize