He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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