if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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