It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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