So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize