mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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