To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
