maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
