The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
