Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize