Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
