I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
So many bounce houses so little time
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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