so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
so much tequila, so little girl.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
