what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
