I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Randomize