Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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