everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
