I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
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