OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
