I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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