His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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