I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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