We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize