sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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