my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
is this the sara with the beer cane?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
