Just mADE A PArabola og urine
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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