do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
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