That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
My vagina is officially offended.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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