Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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