because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
