something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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