there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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