Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
