if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
