You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
