...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
