I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
two words...techno handjob
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
