420 ftw
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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