hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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