I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i just google imaged poop.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
