When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
