Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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