my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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