WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
