Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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