Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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