you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
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