I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Randomize