Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
false alarm. still invincible.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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