I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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