So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i can't believe i had my finger in that
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
